Love yourself to begin with

We are always reminded of the need to love others, and even the Bible reminds us to ‘love your neighbour’. Important messages indeed, but your starting point has to be to remember to love yourself first, as it will be easier and you will have more love to give to others in desparate need of love.

On a similar theme one of my favourite books ‘Psychocybernetics’ written by Maxwell Maltz emphasises a similar concept which he refers to as self-esteem. Naturally in order to possess great self-esteem you obviously need to love yourself.

Loving yourself makes you feel good about yourself and within yourself, being happy and confident. Feeling good in your own skin means that as a result you have a burning desire to help others to improve themselves, be happy and succeed in life.

An added benefit of helping others is that not only will you hve brought joy to their lives, you yourself will feel great as you go about your daily life. This represents what is affectionately termed, ‘a win, win situation!’

 Aled Evans

Never, Ever Give Up Believing!

Never give up hope, have faith, and always keep believing in your dreams, as your life could change dramatically for the better and in a magical, miraculous way today or tomorrow.

As Winston Churchill once so famously said, while I believe addressing students at either Cambridge or Oxford University, “Never, ever, ever, ever give up!”

Each day focus on your dreams and goals with great feelings of desire and a feeling they have been accomplished with great faith. Remember to be positive, taking steps to avoid any negative influences in your life.

The feeling that success and great joy could be just around the corner will keep you going from day to day, rather than giving up on your cherished dreams and goals. 

 Aled Evans

Avoid Being Critical or Nasty or Negative!

One piece of advice found in positive thinking, self-help books is the daily practice of getting in to the habit of not saying a bad thing about any person, and to avoid being critical as you go about your daily life.

On the face of it, this doesn’t seem too difficult to accomplish. However, it is much more difficult than you think, as each day you are exposed to such negativity in this strange world of ours. Unfortunately our opinions and attitudes are formed primarily by what we read in the newspapers and what we watch on television and listen to on the radio.

So the first step is to take care what you read, watch and listen to each day, as there is a great deal of negativity out there, and I could also mention the monster that is ‘social media!’

It will call for great discipline and focus and needless to say will be extremely difficult, but one day at a time, let’s just see if for just one day tomorrow you can go a whole day without saying anything nasty or negative about someone or something.

If in the unlikely event you can and do succeed, let’s see if you can keep it up and go another day without being nasty, judgemental and critical. Who know’s you might even manage a week of positivity, but remember, they say it usually takes around four weeks to establish a pattern or habit, thus breaking old annoying habits! 

Aled Evans

“Find something that feels good, that resonates with your heart.” Dr John Gray

The Power of a Smile

Have you ever stopped for a minute to consider the powerful effect a smile can have on a person? It costs nothing but is absolutely priceless and has a transforming effect on a person’s mood and wellbeing.While a child naturally and instinctively smiles repeatedly during the day, the average adult human being will only smile a couple of times each day, if you are lucky! It is sad that some people never smile!What is important to remember is that by smiling, not only will other people feel better when they see and meet you, you will also feel a hundred times better. A smile brings great benefits to your mental and physical health.Therefore, as you approach each new day in the future, remember to make an effort to smile, as it represents a win, win situation for all concerned.

Aled Evans

Say Goodbye to Social Media!

Maybe it’s time you faced up to the fact that social media can have a negative effect on your life, and besides, much of the information disseminated on these platforms are fake, as Donald Trump liked to put it.

One thing’s certain, these mediums of communication are incredibly addictive and can and do often bring out the worst in people. As someone once said, social media land is full of angry people!

When you think about it, it is incredible to think, and scarcely imaginable a quarter of a century ago, that these platforms have given almost everyone a voice to express their thoughts and feelings, where as in the past, their voice would only be heard in their home, or amongst friends in the local cafe or pub.

However, this freedom or opportunity may not always be a good thing. Human tendency dictates that you are nine times out of ten likely to express a negative feeling or complain when you take to the airwaves or the internet social media platforms. Unfortunately by talking to people, reading newspapers or watching negatively orientated programmes like the news on television, is very much likely to put you in the mood for complaining about your world, and to focus on the negative things in this mad world of ours.

Therefore, the next time you are tempted to have a good old rant or moan in social media land, stop short and think how you could use your time more productively, leaving you feeling much better and generally in a better frame of mind.

Here are a few suggestions just to get your creative juices flowing: 1. Pick up and read a positive influenced book 2. When reading, underline any words that you don’t understand the meaning of and then log on to the Cambridge dictionary website to discover their true meaning and how to pronounce these words. 3. Think of ways you can help a friend or neighbour and bring a smile to their face. The surprising thing is that you will also end up feeling better. 4. Listen to relaxing and inspiring music. 5. Get involved with a history research project. 6. Write an article or even a book on a positive theme, revolving around your hobbies, passion and interests.

Aled Evans

New Year, New You!

Most people will be glad to say goodbye to the year 2020 and its Covid related challenges and the constant feuding over Brexit.

As we look forward optimistically to a new year in 2021, what better time to make a fresh start with the new you taking a more positive attitude and approach to life in general.

Learn to be more grateful about the simple but important things in life. Believe that you can succeed in life. 

Avoid negative people and negative content such as newspapers and news and soap operas on television. Be sure to get plenty of exercise and follow a healthy diet. 

Have fun and laugh frequently. Listen to calm and uplifting music and read positive thinking, self-help books. Show compassion and love towards people and stop criticising and complaining.

Aled Evans

“Better to lose count while naming your blessings than to lose your blessings to counting your troubles.” Maltbie D.Babcock (1858-1901) Writer and Clergyman

Some time during each day, make a list of ten blessings in your life you are grateful for.

“I know no companion so terrible as fear.” Ida Tarbell  

Avoid criticising and getting involved in arguments or confrontations like the plague!

As you go about your life, here are two things that you should strive to avoid in order to feel better, happier and more positive.

Having said this, given that we live in an exceptionally negative world, this is very much a case of ‘easier said than done!’

One has to remember that these insidious habits have been deeply ingrained in most of us since childhood and it takes great effort and discipline to break these toxic habits.

It will be a real challenge, but tomorrow see if you can go through an entire day without being critical of anyone or anything and also avoiding an argument or confrontation with any person.

The trouble is that if you regularly read the newspapers, listen or watch the news or view any one of a multitude of soap operas on the small screen, you will have come to think that this is normal and acceptable behaviour.

If you can do this, your reward will be to feel a thousand times happier, as well as being much more productive and successful in your life!

Aled Evans